Backing Up

I have decided to back up and tell my story. I need to quote Queen Elizabeth the II as this year my family suffered from annus horribilis... A Horrible Year. The phrase came to a wide audience during Queen Elizabeth II's Christmas message in 1992 where she said:

“1992 is not a year I shall look back on with undiluted pleasure. In the words of one of my more sympathetic correspondents, it has turned out to be an 'annus horribilis’.”.

I want to begin at the beginning so I will tell my tale over a few blog entries.

For us the "new" year did not begin exactly on January 1st 2005. I want to say that it began in September of 2004 when my husband saw a posting for a position at the USDA that fit his skills. We went to Los Angeles during Christmas 2004 and our family was to travel to the Pacific Grove / Monterey, CA area. It rained on the California coast during the entire Christmas holiday. When we returned east it was still raining in California until February! Anyhow, during Christmas we planned a trip to Pacific Grove, Monterey as well as Salinas. We wanted to see the area where my husband was applying for a job and We never made it.

The year was full of preparation, deadlines and waiting, waiting, waiting. During January Scott worked very hard to gather his package of information to send to Washington DC for the position. It was due in February. After it was submitted we waited to hear if he would be chosen for an interview.

Tick, tick, tick…

New Doctor Needed 2005

In late 2004 and early 2005, I had been looking for a doctor to have my yearly checkup. I had been unhappy with the first doctor I met when I came to Athens in 2001. She was a woman, quite curt, and I never wanted to return to her office. I had references from others but still they were not quite right. It took a few times for me to notice the ad a new doctor had placed in the newspaper. He had two offices, one in Oconee, which I like to call the Hilton Head of Athens. I liked his name so I decided to call him. This doctor had been posting a small ad in the newspaper for many days or weeks about his new office. I made the appointment and decided after I left that I liked him. It was in Late February or early mach of 2005 he suggested that I return to the hospital for a new mammogram.

Bright

In my last post I wanted to know the origin of my fathers Yiddish name Feivel. My aunt Sandra sent our family tree and made a notation of who my father was named after. I did some research on the internet and found good information about the name Feivel. I found this link http://jewishwebindex.com/names.htm it is a fantastic bit of information about the origin of many Jewish names.

Here is some information about the name Feivel: Feivel - Uri, Shraga and Phoebus (of which Feivish and Feivel are yiddishized corruptions) all mean basically 'bright', 'shining', 'light'. "Fayvush or Faivel are the kinnuim of Shraga. Fayvush is an ancient Jewish name whose origin was the Latin vivus (living, alive), a loan translation (calque) from Hebrew chaim (life). Later the name Fayvush was erroneously considered to be a derivation from Phoebus, god of the sun--consequently Fayvish became the kinnui not only for the Biblical Hebrew name Uri (light) but for the Aramaic name Shraga (candle) in the Rabbinic period. Folk legends along with true and false etymologies gave rise to these interwoven associations between Hebrew name and kinnui."




So there you go his Yiddish name means light, bright... I also saw the word brilliant associated with this name as well.

Eulogy

I thought I would post my fathers eulogy by the Rabbi. I want to read it from time to time and on the internet it will be available. I have another speech written by my cousin that I have to type up ...or I have to have it emailed to me to edit and post. (It is hilarious)

My father Philip died June 18, 2005 – 11 sivan 5765. Shabbos. My friend told me that Holy people die on Shabbat. I am trying to find out more about this and its meaning. My father had a Yiddish nickname Katckie and it means little duck. He was called little duck for a few reasons as he was someone you did not forget. He was a cracker jack kid who was a fine natural athlete and small in stature. His real name was Philip — the meaining of the name Philip is 'Lover of Horses'. I know that when you dream of horses it has to do with LIFE. A strong flowing and moving forward life. This is a photo of my dad on or about 1944. His brother was in the military and I was told, a very young Colenel. I suppose dad is wearing part of his older brother Nathan's uniform. I love this photo and have it in a frame in my home.



Here is the Rabbi's Speech

Shraga Feivel ben shmuel

The Mishna in Avot 4:3 teaches us:

V’al Tihee Maflig lochol Davar – Do not be disdainful toward anything
Shein Licha Adam Shein lo sha’ah, v’ayn licha davar shein lo makom

For there is no person that doesn’t have their moment, and there is nothing that does not have its place.

Philip not only had his moment, but he had every moment.

This Mishna is teaching us that there is a value to every person in the world, because everyone has something unique about them . . . With his great brilliance and compassion, together with his sharp wit and humor, Philip had many unique things about him – he was just always ON, with a rare energy and passion for life, for love, for justice, his family and for people.

Was there anything in this world that was more dear to him than his 2 daughters? The man simply did not know how not to brag about them. His love and pride for his girls flowed endlessly like the seas.

And his wife Irene, who had so much love and respect for him, and Hashem only knows how much patients, or as Phillip said at Irene’s 70th birthday party, “There is no woman on this earth could have ever put up with me like Irene.”

Irene kept Phillip grounded, at least as much as Phillip was able to be.

Phillip was clever and savvy in his own way, eccentric. He was uninhibited and driven by the very values and passions he held so dearly.

He was always so full of life and energy. Whenever he entered a room, he was everywhere at the same time, his presence filled the room and reach everyone.

How did Katchkie express his love for Judaism? Like everything else... very bluntly.

He would approach strangers on the street and have no problem telling them all about who he really was as a Yid.

In fact, he loved people so much that if asked for directions, he would never give them, rather he would take the people himself, while giving them a historic tour of Charleston, and then invite them to his home for dinner.

The notion of loving other people is exactly how the great Sage Hillel summarized the entire Torah, everything else is commentary. This is how Philip lived, he knew Yiddishkeit and was a student of the torah and of Jewish history, and he made sure to live this dictum through all his interactions with everyone he met.

This is the Philip that we all knew and loved, but what about the Philip that people didn’t know . . . ?

Israelis are often described as Sabras, a prickly pear. The reason is that a Sabra represents the type of person that is rough and prickly on the outside, but on the inside is soft and sweet. Philip was a Sabra.

He would help anyone that every needed anything, he would constantly volunteer his services pro bono to anyone that could not afford to pay. He would go out of his way and perform countless acts of Chessed, kindness, that nobody in this room will ever even know about.

When asked why doesn’t he just retire, he responded, retire? Then what would my clients do?
His life was meaningful because of all the people he cared for and touched.

So my question is, if Philip deep down was such a soft and gentle man, why did we see the rough and tough, flippant and witty Philip?

The answer can be found in the Torah reading that we read on the morning of Philips passing.

The torah says, “V’haish moshe anav mikol Adam” and the man Moses was the most humble of all men. Truth be told, Moses was in fact a great person, but of all his great qualities, why is the Torah emphasizing his humility? Because humility is the single greatest quality that a person can have, in order make way for other areas of greatness.

Why did Philip always act so outgoing? Because like Moses, he was a man of great humility – which gave way to further greatness. Philip was in fact so humble that he put on the roughest exterior possible because he never wanted anybody to ever look at him and think of him as being a kind and sweet man, so he always acted to the contrary, while deep down he was a gem, it was his humility and modesty that made him into that Sabra.

Philip touched more lives than even he, the great tax lawyer could ever count.

People admired him so much that they would often imitate him, they would do Katchkie . . . with the legacy that he is leaving us, we too should all do a little bit of katchkie, and incorporate some of his legacy into our lives.

The Mishna we read told us that every person has their moment, but dear Katchkie, you have given us a lifetime of moments that we will always cherish, and remember you by.

Tehe nishmaso tzrura bitzror hachayim. May the soul of Shraga Feivel ben Shmuel be bound in the bonds of eternal life, and let us say, Amein.